seeds

they cannot grow & bear fruit
until they die to themselves.

Happy Christmas, my loves!

after all of the bustle of Christmas Eve,
my sister Michelle and I
sat in silence
in front of the fireplace
with the Christmas tree lit.

so much peace.

Jesus Christ .Emmanuel. "God with us"

Yes!! He is!!!!

finals week

is over tomorrow!
I have a photography & Spanish final left..

I fly out of Dallas the 17th..

my friend Olivia {from South Korea}
is visiting me in San Diego from the 22nd-25th

my friends Meredith, Austin & Harrison
are visiting after Christmas, for about a week and a half

couldn't be more excited!!!

photography by Meredith Richey

Deuteronomy 32:10-12 {NIV}

"In a desert land he found him,
in a barren and howling waste.

He shielded him and cared for him;
he guarded him as the apple of his eye,
like an eagle that stirs up its nest
and hovers over its young,
that spreads its wings to catch them
and carries them aloft.

The Lord alone led him;
no foreign god was with him."

going to school in another state

helps me identify with
being a daughter of the King

instead of a daughter of the Shapiro family

...

random!
i forgot to tell you

God asked me to cut off all my hair
& trust Him

He wants to teach me to see myself the way
He sees me

When He says "you're beautiful. i delight in you so much"
He wants me to believe Him.

So last Thursday night,
Tommy Fry buzzed my head, prayed over me,
and said "God has a peace about this.
This is your new ministry!
Be excited!! You look good! You look good!"

it took me an hour to have the
gumption to face the world with my new self

but since then, i'm experiencing more and more freedom
freedom from lies
freedom from worry
freedom from opinion

my hair is something that glorifies Him

something that brings Him into conversation
with all that i meet.

mm. it's so wonderful.
and light.
and a reminder of
how gentle and faithful God is.

don't get me wrong,
it's difficult sometimes
but it's SO WORTH IT.

ironic

that i'm typing this out...
but
i'm really learning to speak,

to say what's on my mind,

to share with others
pieces of me,
not just the
"Holy Spirit" in me

but also, Natalie.

haha, it just sounds so weird.
i've learned to speak with my eyes
and my smile.

but
i need my words, too.

life is slowing down

not that i'm less busy

but that i'm finding it easier
to rest.
stop.
pause.
and meditate on the fact that
GOD IS WITH US, AH!

so great.

Selah.

hate being dry

this weekend will be a time to refresh.

+ many art projects ahead of me {whoopay!}

i.e.

abstract illustration of
"i'm a line and i feel sassy"
for design methods class

a fully rendered
frontal view of the human skull
for figure drawing class

develop and print
black and white film
for "quality of light" study

...

He's all around me.

Flyleaf "All Around Me"

conversations with Elisa & Harrison

we are spiritual beings having a physical experience

not physical beings having a spiritual experience

...

how did creation react to Jesus Christ's presence
on the earth?

did the trees and grass lean towards their Creator
when He lay asleep?

{apparently, this is a concept from My Epic}

...

my thoughts this day:

.God has blessed the world with coffee.
the divine drip© -Ryan Paulson

boy, did i need it earlier.

thinking...

Palomar Community College in the Spring & Summer
and then transfer to Cal State San Marcos in the Fall...

brainstorming about a place to live...

my house is an option.
but i'd rather not.

after a lot of soul searching

i have decided to transfer to a school in Southern CA
{maybe Cal State San Marcos}

.incredibly thankful for your prayers!

.i have so much peace and direction

.bitter-sweet. but more sweet.
because there's so much hope & promise

peace.

mm.

please look up Kari Jobe's You Are For Me

sinks deep inside.

...

my loans and finances have been such a burden.
such a burden that my health is on the line.

please lift me up in prayer.

I'm praying for wisdom, guidance, and peace
..about transfering schools in the Spring..

how deep the Father's love for us.

how vast beyond all measure.

that He should give His only Son.

to make a wretch His treasure.

survived

first day of classes

so excited to take:

tennis {so i can compete with my family when i'm home}
black & white, film photography
ballet {have to wear pink tights, a black leotard, & ballet slippers!}
spanish {for my minor}
figure drawing
graphic design {the concentration of my studio art~BFA}

...

getting sick, but am resting a lot

...

i love my new residents.
they're awesome.

p.s.
i'm assigned to the residents of the
"Animals & Human Society"
Engaged Learning Group

A-Ok

Flights went well,
met awesome people on the plane,
& arrived safely to Baylor
with Adam
after staying with Katie in Dallas

i'm already completely upacked
and there's a collage on my board
above my bed!

*deep sigh*
i'm here.
*smile*

weird dreams this week..

for example:

.being tipsy the. entire. time.
which is weird..ya know? cause i've never been tipsy.
oddly enough, it was more of a...
tipsy/hangover/angry/sad dream.
so weird.

anywho,
i'm so excited to be able to go to
PB {Pacific Beach} today to visit
Britt, my best friend since 3rd grade
..she's here from Montana!!

my little brother always asks me
when i'm making chocolate chip cookies
& i can happily say i finally made
some this summer

Tadashi and Kaylynn joined me.

our large, glass cookie jar
is full, once again.

open house & casual bonfire

for my "Off to TX" goodbyes..

so thankful for all who came tonight!

loved star gazing with
Steven, Pedro, & Andy afterward

Paige wrote me such an encouraging card
and wrote Isaiah 43:1-3 in it!!
which was incredible! because
it has been SUCH a significant verse
in my life the past 2 years

{i'm getting it tattooed on my arm
in about 2 years} --after i pay my loans

Isaiah 43:1-3

look it up.

i fly out to texas

the 6th of August!

can you believe it?

i'm so excited but
fearful to re-unite with
my storage in Kokernot's basement.

out of sight, out of mind.