God wants my heart

after much stress, disappointment, grief, lack of self confidence, lack of stability in God's Word and prayer, God has captured my heart! finally!!!!!!

coming home has been extremely difficult. I felt as though I have no community here {God has shown me otherwise}. I felt as though no one in my family {except for my mom} really cared that I was here. BUT.


BUT, God spoke truth into my life through various people.
The first known instance was driving with Amanda to Palomar Mountain.
Instead of having a dance party in the car on the way down, we decided to talk about God. haha -a MUCH better subject. we both found that it would be awesome to go through a book together. but this is so exciting, because when I normally say that to another person, it usually doesn't work out. because of my lack of discipline or their's {usually always mine, though}. but I know that God wants for us to read through a book together and become closer friends and closer to Him. Anyone have any ideas as to what book?

The second time was when we went back up to Palomar Mountain the next day and greeted the head chef up there in the dining hall {my old boss}. He asked how we were. we answered. and THEN. and THEN! He asked us what God was teaching us. how convicting. so very convicting.

This morning has broken me down. I was so prideful. I was not living in truth and was not bringing truth into other people's lives.

The tip of the iceberg was when I read Leslie's blog about her time in Florence. This beautiful friend of mine is captivated by God's love and seeks His will for her life- something that I had lost in the past semester and beginning of the summer. Her blog update was so focused on the Lord, that I just stopped and saw His goodness. It was completely evident that God brought grace, wisdom, direction and love into her life. His character was all over the words on the computer screen. it is breathtakin--> {http://motleymeadows.wordpress.com/}

Thank you to everyone who is following Jesus Christ and bringing truth into my life.

Lord, thank you for bringing myself back to you. Thank you for not giving up on me.


i left my heart on palomar mountain

i miss camp.
it was great to visit it for two days.
glorious, actually.

yay! i get to see Aaron and Manda on thursday on his day off.

what fun to play cards, ping pong, and
say hi to people i love at this christian camp
that i worked at for the past two summers.

on for the job hunt! going to stop by at
Quizno's and Marie Calender's tomorrow.
wish me luck!


and the doorbell didn't ring

i've been cleaning a lot this morning
my oldest sister has her
college graduation party tomorrow!

busy times, yet i'm home alone
in a crazy silence despite
the humming of the dish washer.
surprisingly pleasant noise.

still job searching...don't know where to look.
no one wants to hire seasonal workers


went to wonderful bar-b-que at a
Carlsbad State Beach campsite last night,
joined my parent's old
Bible study group for some din din.

it was major high tide but i insisted
that my friend Laura and I still take a walk.
we ran beneath the
cliff base trying to get past each
wave as it came close and then
geesh, so much adrenaline. haha


a new quest

this summer, i am determined to learn
how to sew beautiful clothing.
today, i have been blessed to pick
fresh apricots in the rain.
quite fun.

and begin
Pride and Prejudice
{the 5 hour version}


home home on the range

been chillin at home, bored a lot. and i mean... a. lot.

no where to go, really.
watched the beginning of "surfs up" -got bored.
made some organic black tea. then got bored.

i'll save you the rest of the boredomnesstrosity. yes, i shall indeed.

But, i can tell you that i had a job interview
at GAP INC. this morning!

{i find out by tomorrow at 6 p.m.
whether or not i get the job}